Give Me A Reason To Live On

The Mistress♥

Ting Ting is my name.
I'm a purple + black lover.
I might look strong on the outside,
but definitely weak, inside.

Shouts♥

Her Mood♥

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Affliates♥

Sok Kim Pei Man
BoyBoy Max Wong
Michie Sabrina
Kc Hui Ying
Audrey Sera
You Jin Rachael
Su-Lyn
Wan Lin
Yvonne Ong Nura
Charmaine Wei Wen
Nathira Jia Li
Elsie Jasmine
Eevonne Dalina
Aliya Kavitha
Kathy Goh Baby
Wei Yan Selina
Xuan XiaoMin
Jiray Ah Jon
Xiao B Snow Mei
Leon Jeanette
Rainie Heavenxanqel
iiMagicJYii Yanny
Aikemii YukariHoney
Si Yuan Jocelyn
Jesmond Ben[vvoshih3ro]

Archives

♥ April 2008
♥ May 2008
♥ June 2008
♥ July 2008
♥ August 2008
♥ September 2008
♥ October 2008
♥ November 2008
♥ December 2008
♥ January 2009
♥ February 2009
♥ March 2009
♥ April 2009
♥ May 2009
♥ June 2009
♥ July 2009
♥ August 2009
♥ September 2009
♥ October 2009
♥ November 2009
♥ December 2009
♥ January 2010
♥ February 2010
♥ March 2010
♥ April 2010
♥ May 2010
♥ June 2010
♥ July 2010
♥ October 2010
♥ April 2011

Credits

Don't even touch this

Basecodes from:
♥chocodiiction-lovesxoxo*
Designer: Miss Vunique
Background by:
Fivepointsapart
Inspired by:
The song When i look at you by Miley Cyrus
Others:
1 2 3

got an sms from sabrina this morning.

saying that her grandfather is in the hospital,

asthma attack.

suddenly i thought of,

"when is it gonna be my turn?"

when will i get my asthma attack,

laying in the hospital bed,

feeling breathless.

letting the doctor & nurse to save me.

but then again,

do i wanna be save?

sometimes,

is just so tiring living in this world.

seeing how many ppl's i actually had hurt.

maybe is just best for me to leave as well,

at least, i will hurt them for the last time,

and then my name will be gone from their life.

im me, just me.

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 8:11 AM

FUCK MYSELF UP _l_

indeed.. i screwed myself up.

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 8:10 AM

SATURDAY[2111o9]

woke up pretty early but got headache after that. =/

kns de.

superb unwell.

went maple,

do some quest and really buey tahan.

took my nap at 1pm.

woke up at 3.30pm after that.

sit in front of the pc while bii and dii get ready to meet up later on.

i got ready at around 4pm, took my bath, blow my hair.

met them at my block again, at 5pm.

took the mrt to habourfront.

went straight to see the timing for movie's.

but sian,

long Q.

and all the movie was filling fast.

was thinking whereter to watch or not.

in the end, we took the Q.

and we bought ticket for "The Xmas Carol 3D".

9.10pm ticket =/

at 1st,

dii and cp was kinda reluctant to watch this movie when i told them that i was like so so wanting to watch.

LOLs.

but overall, the 3D spec made the movie really interesting. (:

is like real snow are around the cinema.

ke ke.

soo funn.. ^^

went for dinner at the food court after buying the ticket.

i had my usual, meehoon + those fried stuff e.g : prawn crackers, fishball, etc etc.

cp wanted popiah also.

so we ordered two rolls of it.

as usual,

dii wanted something to do with chicken.

got him his chicken rice.

and cp got his seafood steamboat.

okies !! again !!

eat dao yao vomit.

is like really forcing everything in!

._. !

hu's fault?!

cp lar..

order so much =x

after that, we went to see my lighting !!! (:

the xmas tress was really really lovely!

see the 2 boy's infront ~~ spoilt my photo =x ..

a closer shot (: .. lovely?

went Mu-Ee after that.

got myself a cigi box. =/

can see dii wasnt very happy.

either can cp stop me.

and im sure BFF is gonna be so dissapointed after knowing this.

sorry guys.

the front cover of the cigi box (:

inside the box ! mild seven ori rox ! =x

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 11:45 AM

FRIDAY [2011o9]

took leave on this particular day.

no why.

reason being was only because, i need a break.

& i got too many leave to clear. ^^

cp came to have breakfast with my bro & ii at kovan.

met him like around 10am.

ate kueh chap.

than ate a lil dim sum also.

LOLs.

full until i wanna burst.

drank sugar cane ^^ ..

superb craving for that for the last few days.

went popular after that,

bro wanna get some colour paper. =/

got home at around 12+pm.

cp tried to fix my maple.

stupid cock up patch.

than after that, around 3pm.

my maple finally working edi ! (:

thanx alot bii (: ..

met dii at my house for lunch+dinner.

they waited for me at my house block while i go and take my bath again.

then , headed to kovan again. ._.

had new york new york coz cp havent eat there b4 (:

we had some meat platter and ice cream.

hell sia..

eat until all of us dont know how to talk liao.

and the waitress even offer us cotton candy x3

dii melting cotton candy. *his happily talking to aiai over the phone* =x

the giant banana boat. i think they should name it the banana titanic instead of boat. ._.

went home superb bloated after that.

oh yah!

we bought cash together.

aiai, cp, dii and me.

had been waiting for aiai to discharge from the hospital that day, for finally TODAY (:

taadaaa !! our new cash outfit (:

lets make out the possibility out of the impossibility (:

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 10:55 AM

people are just weird, aren't they?

they change each time.

to suit the environment.
to suit themself.

to be happy.

to get what they want.

i changed.

i know.

compared to the teenage life of me.

im working now.

i need to suit the environment.

and i know im more realistic now.

but isnt this what human being are born for?

the last survival wins the race?

the bet?

i hurted uu again and again.

i dont deny.

i was selfish.

and im really sorry.

i sacrified our love so that i could at least have another chance to see a brighter future.

letting you trying to get me back.

just to at least get another chance to hold my hand, to cuddle me in your sleep.

and i ignore every existent that uu had done just for me.

im awake from whatever ~~shit~~ kind of fairy tales.

fairy tales are a totally bullshit things for what i see now.

i cant be the gurl hu are owez jumping around,

pampered uu,

or even give all my times for relationship.

yet, i cant be there for uu when uu needed me.

i wants to be there for uu,always.

but i cant.

but the chance, uu took it away.

you never wanna be just friends,

simply because uu said "i cant treat some1 i love as a normal friend".

but have uu seen where are the "push" button to another starting?

you didn't give urself another chance,

in the end,

it was you who gave up every single things.

every single hope.

uu requested not to contact anymore.

till the day i would wanna get back with uu.

i agreed to it.

i cant be so selfish.

i cant be a total bitch.

and i promise to be lost from your world.

getting my iphone tomorrow as agreed by the singtel guy.

a great time to totally change my number.

ppl's, let me know if uu wants my new number.

see how much we had change?

can uu see the different?

& now things eventually faded..

≈leaving behind the relationship, memories remains always.≈

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 7:03 AM

yesterday was a really F.U.N day (:

was like really having fun in the office too.

playing throwing ball with boss, yee han, jasper and jonathan.

boss said im a good thrower but a bad catcher :x

met dii at my office after work.

was raining and both of us got caught in the rain while waiting for the cab.

wanted to take a bus, but raining.. -.-

talked about his school life today.
how empty school was, how he di siao his friend.

and he show me a short video that he took in school.

glad he had fun (:

reached junction8 at round 6.15pm.

cp sms-ed me and said he will be late.

so dii and ii walked around.

dropped by converse to buy my shoe 1st (:

the sales girl got a lil pissed when i told her that i wanna match a purple shoe laces with shoes in the shop.

so she need to untie and tie on each shoe i choose.

ike hey, im not that fussy rite..

and i only picked 2 shoes.

the 2nd one was the 1 i bought.

=.=!!

seeee.. my shoe with and without purple lace ~ (:

a closer look at the pattern of my shoe .. snow flakes ~ x3

than we walked to get the movie ticket for 2012.

the entire cinema are full..

we only managed to get the 2nd row for the front. x.x

not too bad tho.

at least we are not whining.

LOLs.

cp reached after that.

at around 7pm.

had our dinner at pizza hut.

kinda lots of memory flash back when i was at pizza hut.

hhm.. how do i say it?

and guess i was dazing yesterday till cp said i was quiet.

nway, dinner was lovely.

(:'

than quickly headed to the cinema as it was like 8pm edi.

i went to the loo while dii and cp went and get popcorn+drinks.

movie started at 8.15pm and ended at 11pm.

long rite? (:

and ppl,

uu got to watch this movie.

its amazingly niceee (:

*thumbs up*

oh yah!!

x'mas is around the corner.

alot of shopping centre started their decoration.

and this is the 1 i manage to take from junction8 de.

there..the lighting ! (:

i wanna take lots of x'mas lighting this year.

so who wanna pei me walk around and take photo? x)

took a cab home after that.

uncle drove past upper serangoon road.

suddenly reminded me of what my ex-bf,

used to drove me to around there.

a deserted place.

and.. *fullstop*

you wouldn't wanna know what he did to me.

oh well,

the past.. it taught me how to judge a person.

taught me to grow stronger.

*gone by the wind*

fun fun day (:

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 11:56 AM

yeap.

i got my pay increment letter on tuesday.

mc on wed.

and yesterday,

$200 voucher !!

for what reason?

LOL..

for getting "the best support award".

oh yah.. oh yah..

i need to thank my mother, my father.. my great grandmother, my uncle,aunt..

phewwwww *PAUSE*

nahhh..

i just wanna thanx NURA who build me up to who i am today. (:

thanx buddy.

and i will be going junction8 after work later bahs (:

get myself a rubber shoe.

LOLs.

rubber rubber shoe!! :D

this is so gonna make rina say "can you buy GURLS flat instead of rubber shoe??!?!?!" =x

my answer "CANNOT" ! =x

okay bye =x

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 6:56 AM

a sudden burst of emotional, again.

things dont always go right, isnt it?

and then again,

im feeling unsecure?

why?

idk.

dont ask me.

so many bad memories flash back.

my brain couldnt take it nmore.

i wanna scream.

i wanna cry.

i wanna laugh.

what the hell is wrong with me?

did i make the correct move?

or was it a wrong one,again?

why am i feeling so unsecure?

am i being too selfish or sensitive?

who can i really share my joy and sorrow with?

is there any1 that i could relay on?

somebody, answer me.

im going crazy, like before.

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 8:23 PM

yesterday was a pretty confusing day.

did sms-ed with Chris.

talked alot.

idk..

i just wanna remain friends now.

some stuff are just pretty unclear.

that's for sure.

what will happen in the future,

is just beyond my control.

did not tell silly about this.

sorry.

i just didn't know how to.

Dii got confused together with me.

sorry.

ray did called me last nite and talked to me.

and woah!!

he got like superb lots of coin in his pet society!!

good rite? (:

ke ke..

no no.. i got no intention to take his coin..

no no.. =x

maybe slightly lar..

ah hem..

ke ke.. =x

nway,

like FINALLY,

i received my pay increment.

woohoo !!

been waiting for this day for the longest time !! (:

SHOPPING !!! x3

and i still got no news from the IPhone vendor !!!

OOOOIII !!! MY IPHONE!!!! D:

oh yah.. silly is out with his fellows friends.

like finally too.

have fun alrite pig.

dont make mistake ! (:

teehee..

off to work !!!

ciaozz.

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 1:03 PM

reached office at 8am in a drizzling monday morning.

felt kinda cold.

left my jacket at home, again.

damn.

yesterday was like a f*uking tiring day.

my mood was like swinging to the north & east.

superb unstable.

smiling and laughing,

the next minute,

uu can see me bursting out all kind of vulgarities.

daddie and mummie quarreled yesterday too.

like WTF.

this is what happen when boh maid in the family.

sure upside down.

daddie went crazy.

throwing everything in the living room.

the letters, my brothers knee guard, his punching glove.

and i was like silent all the way UNTIL he threw my towel too !

kn'n..

i was like "WTF are uu doing? throwing my towels away??! than uu might as well throw the pc away too since is placed in the living room??!"

and he replied softly, knewing that he got me pissed, "put in the living room meaning dont want."

and i replied, "dont kong kam lar.."

im already in a fucking confuse and tiring mood yesterday.

yet he came and step all over me.

PEACE fucker.

uu bad mood ur problem lar.

grrr..

nway,

talked to ray in msn.

dont think his alrite.

guess his lack of fun&joy.

or pretty boring staying at home,

doing nth.

making him think alot.

silly created an email for me to access to FB to get coins for my pet society.

indeed.

im pretty into pet society lately.

like suddenly. =/

oh well,

im very very sure that i will get bored of it, soon.

than went in to maple,

chatted with aiai, wei yan, silly,ray,elaine and holy nu er.

thats all for my sunday.

craps weekend. =/

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 8:15 AM

went over to lynn house last friday after work with sabrina.. (:

was looking thru her wedding photo.

can see that shes really happy & found the right guy.

oh well, what about mine?

hhm..

we played wii at her house.

bowling, cycling, fighting,cooking mama & mario cart.

played fighting with sabrina until both of us when kuku.

LOLs.

it was really funn..

and i played till bang my leg on the sofa.

ouch. -.-

no need to mention luh, blue black le luh.. -.-

lynn's husband bought mcd for us,

but sabrina ~~husband~~ bf was rushing her to go home.

idk why.

its only 10+pm. ._.

oh well, she happy jui hao le but i will never allow a guy to tie me down till this stage.

yesterday,

had a delivery man to deliver breakfast for me (:

thanx alot slave! LOLs. =x

took an afternoon nap from 1-4pm.

long horr? :x

woke up, went to ntuc with mummie.

bought some daily food for breakfast and daddie tonic drink[his beer].

went to buy top up also.

gave him $50 for a $28 top up.

in the end he gave me back $32.

LOLs.

zuan dao $10 :x

poor guy.

had bread for dinner last nite + a honey milktea.

than went papu and sg boss with cp,wei yan and aiai.

was funnnn..

only manage to sleep at 3.30am last nite.

body was really tiring but my brain just cant stop working. =/

sms-ed pei man.

miss her like hell much =/

woke up today at 10am. x.x

really really tiring..

oh yah,

im getting my iphone soon. ^^

thanx to sabrina..

love you gurl <3

aiks.

nway, is monday tomorrow.

time for work again.

and is gonna be commission month AGAIN. ._.

so diaoss.

life?

freedom?

love?

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 2:34 PM

this is what happen when ryan saw a kid in the office..

or probably when a kid saw ryan in the office..

LOLS..

fun at work (:

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 1:51 PM

aiai going for her operation today..

i mean, now.

did talked to her last nite.

she just kept crying.

tried making her laugh,

in the end,

i make her laugh till she choke. =/

she cried saying "take care & thanx 4 everything"..

i couldnt really hear what she says,

but i know shes trying to bid goodbye.

somehow,

my heart sink.

tho i just know her not long ago.

but still, shes my friend..

some1 that we had joy and laughter for the past few months.

thanx to ray for bringin her into our guild.

to also allowed wei yan to have a taste of "love".

i dont know how long the operation gonna take.

60% success.

40% failure.

so stuck in between.

hopefully everything will turn out well..

nope of us can do anything,

except wait.

"AIAI, jiayou.. we still got alot of imcomplete things that we plan to do together, right?" =]

im waiting 4 uu okay ! (:

fucking define LIFE for me.

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 12:19 PM

smoke smoke..

smoke all my problem away please.. x]

wish upon a star that dont shine anymore.

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 8:48 PM

full of emotional last few days.

maid went back to indonesia.
home sweet home for her.

at least she can be happy, and now lead a 21years old life just like me.

officially declared ~~single~~.

3years+ relationship,

i dont feel uu, neither do uu.

so whats the point of being together,correct?

i dont wanna be a selfish person,

uu should go find your happiness when i cant even make uu happy.

idk.

oh well,

life goes on.

went for my relatives wedding dinner last saturday at jb.

and at the same time,

i went and cut my hair SHORT.

short FTW (:
okay.. lets take my previous long hair to compare my current short hair pics.

see? this is the long hair me..

current me with short hair.

bro and i in the wedding dinner.

no different between long & short?

LOL :O

btw, thanx cp and wei yan for coming to pei me yesterday.

had breakfast & dinner with me.

love uu guys!

and when things started fading,

it's just so hard amending it back.

just have to walk forward,

and look for a different entrance,

all over again.

i love you so deeply much, but do you? 10:02 AM